My uncertainty is really funny to me and almost comforting because it's almost exactly the way I was when I first went to college. I said I wasn't going to go to college- I wanted to move to New York and be a singer- but I also said that when I wanted to drop out of high school. So now I'm not really sure where I'm going, but I still know what I want to do and that has never changed. But just like my first year of college, all my friends have plans and destinations, grad schools, real jobs, pay checks that come each week, but nothing is definite for me right now. But I'm just going to follow it. In fact, the absolute best time of my life was my first semester at University of Maryland.. two weeks before I started looking for a place to live- all the dorms had been filled up.. I said "I guess I'll go to college" lol so with no expectation, it was this whole new world. I lived off campus on the same street as my sister, her boyfriend and my brother lived a little drive away. haha it was amazing.. They kind of paved the way a little bit so it was a nice transition and very exciting to be hanging out with the "older kids" as a little freshman.
I had a show last week at Rockwood music hall and we went to a party the following night. Really nothing had changed except our scenery.. I felt like it was freshman year all over again. Instead of going to "Bentleys" the local bar up the street, we were going to "Hudson Terrace"- a fun rooftop bar on the west side of manhattan. Hha well that is a bit of an upgrade... it didn't smell and there were models there lol I feel so lucky to get to do this with her- go through all these crazy changes.. It's like we have a new start ahead of us. Or I'd like to think of it that way- not holding onto who we were, but reminding each other of who we are.
note to self: remember to enjoy the journey.
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